Episode 1 - "Lakini's Juice" by Live

(Please just read my Notes entry, it'll be so much easier for all of us)

Anyway, this wasn't the song I wanted to start my... "series" with, but I heard it the other day, and one line alone was just so amazingly off-the-wall that it demanded attention and the pilot episode of my... whatever the hell this is.

So... lyrics are in italics, my little interruptions are in regular upright type. The more you know.

Wul, here I go. Maiden voyage. First step is always the hardest. I could get bored of doing this next week, or I could make a career out of it. It could all hinge on this. Motherfuck, dude, I need to stop stressing.

It was an evening I shared with the sun
Okay, so far, so good; the singer is a nature freak, but that's not offensive or disturbing.
To find out where we belong
...make that a religious nature freak. 'Kay, I don't judge, I just hope he doesn't take a dive for the insane.
From the earliest days
We were dancing in the shadows
...um... is... is this a cult or something? Y'know, I heard that the song title (as well as the name of the album it's on) are references to Hinduism, and I thought maybe the lyrical content was a reference, too, but so far it looks like and offshoot of druidism. I've noticed that a lot of American musicians who have never met Hindu people treat their religion as a nifty little thing with neat little details, like it's some sort of mythology that they would like to tinker around with and incorporate in their work one day for novelty purposes. Now, I live in an incredibly diverse area and know a lot of Hindu people, so I have added incentive to not offend them beyond, y'know, human decency. To whichever idiot in Live wrote this (probably that bald dude, their frontman and possible egotist Ed Kowalczyk): if you wrote this about a semi-obscure Eastern religion, you are a douche bag for making it look like a fuckin' cult.

More wine
Because I got to have it
See? Now he's an alcoholic douche bag.
More skin
Because I got to eat it
Oh, shit. What the fuck have I gotten myself into? Now he's a fuckin' cannibal?

Inside the outside
Okay, Ed, now you're just making shit up.
By the river
Used to be so calm
Used to be so sane
Just like me! Oh, wait---that uber-retarded line is coming up!
I rushed the ladies' room
Took the water from the toilet
I literally burst out laughing when I first heard this. Why the fuck would anyone ever do that!? How damn important was it that you were running? Why the ladies' room? Why the fucking toilet, are you morally opposed to the sink? The hilarity melted to anger as the questions I could (and did) ask piled on, and I realized this was probably illegal in several states, stealing toilet-bowl water from the opposite gender's washroom. "Luckily" (that's a relative term here), Eddie had the balls to tell us what he wanted to do with his magic shit-water.
Washed her feet and blessed her name
You fucking idiot, you risked a voyeurism charge and bacterial contamination for that? Of all the sources of water--in the world--you chose a stall in the women's lavatory? That's the last place in the world for you to be when you have a rod, bro. And what, again, was the fucking rush? Did she just get shot and this was some equivalent to her last rites?

More peace
Is such a dirty habit
She's at peace, and there's blood everywhere. Yup, bitch got shot.

Slow down, we're too afraid
"Drive the ambulance slower, man, we're afraid that if she lives, it'll mean I meant into a lady's room for no reason."

Let me ride
No.
Let me ride
Naw, man, I don't trust you anymore.
Burn my eyes
That I will do, however.
Let me ride
Shut the fuck up, Kowalczyk, your lyrics are downright offensive.

~Live
~"Lakini's Juice"
~Sectret Samadhi
~1997, Radioactive Records
~http://www.songmeanings.net/songs/view/40933/
~http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tnFKaU8H4v8

So, I'd've thought that this song was about a guy killing his girlfriend as part of a cultic sacrifice. It was, apparently, about obsessive love.

Meh. Close enough.

Sorry if you like this song, but I freaking hate it, and I'm glad I got it out of my system.

-Wilson A.